The Sell

"Hello! May I speak to Mary Francis, please?"

"This is Mary Francis."

"Mary Francis at 232 N. 38th Street?"

"Yes?"

"CONGRATULATIONS, Mary Francis! This is J. Blo, at KWHY Radio, and you have won the Grand Prize in our Jackpot Drawing!"

"I WON?" "ME?  Oh my God, I won!"   "I WON!"

"Grand Prize?" "I won Grand Prize?" "What? What did I win?"

"You, Mary Francis, have won a ONE YEAR SUBSCRIPTION TO THE CONDOM OF THE MONTH CLUB! Each month you will receive a case of their most popular designs, a different design each month for twelve months!"   "CONGRATULATIONS, MARY FRANCIS!"

"But....but....what am I going to do with them? I don't need condoms.."

"Mary Francis, of course you need condoms! EVERYBODY needs condoms, Mary Francis!" "Are you married, Mary Francis?"

"Well, yes I am, but..."

"Then this is PERFECT for you! I mean how many of us truly know where our husbands or wives have been every waking minute of every day, Mary Francis? Why, none of us do, Mary Francis, and that's why this prize is the prize for YOU! Now, I just need a little more..."

"But you don't understand."

"Oh, yes I do, Mary Francis! Yes, I do! You are in denial, Mary Francis! You need protection, Mary Francis, and we at KWHY Radio and the Condom Of The Month Club are here for you! You'll be glad you have these when you finally come to see him for the slime ball he is! Now, I just need a little more info, Mary Francis and you'll be able to start enjoying your prize in 7 to 10 days from today! Just think, Mary Francis, you will no longer need to worry about where he's been or with who! You will be able to 'have at it', Mary Francis, with who ever you want, when ever you want, with out having to stop and make a mad dash to the corner store because you were unprepared! A years worth of dissese free encounters are waiting for you just around the corner, Mary Francis! Now, I need your..."

"STOP! My name is SISTER Mary Francis! I am MARRIED to the CHURCH, and I won't be needing any condoms, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!"

"Oh, Sister! I am so sorry!" "Maybe you could give them to the Bishop. He may know a priest of questionable..."


CLICK!
(©2010 RayleneDeschenes)