Woe is me!
A great tragedy has befallen The Kingdom Of All That Is Moi! One unlike any The Kingdom has ever experienced before!
It happened day before yesterday, but I was unable to bring myself to talk about it until now....
Thursday evening, feeling overworked and unappreciated, my microwave committed suicide! It left its comatose corpse with a sticky note attached that read:
“Raylene,
You should have appreciated the easy-peasy life which I had given you a little more than you did. You took advantage of all my bells and whistles, my self-turning table, numerous quick set buttons, and high voltage to appease your hunger and loathing to cook. Yet, aside from a daily wipe-down, I don't think you knew who I was. Let's see how much you appreciate me now that I'm gone.
Ha, ha, ha!
Your Microwave,
Fluffy”.
(heavy sobbing, sniffle, sniffle!)
There are no words, people....... There are just no words......
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